I really hate it when my brain decides to go on vacation without discussing it with me first. It's not like I would deny it its right to a little time off. But a little heads up would be nice is all. Maybe then I could call in sick to work, cancel all my appointments, or just not answer my phone.
So now, while my brain has been getting a tan on the white beaches of Jamaica, I've been here, in this cold, crappy weather, making a fool of myself for the last few days.
Example One: For the life of me I couldn't figure out why my garage door wouldn't close. Turns out my key fob isn't equipped for that sort of thing...
Example Two: On my way to work, which is a route I take several days a week, I got off at the wrong exit. Sure, this seems like no big deal. But when I got back on the freeway I got on the ramp that would take me in the opposite direction of my intended destination. How did I not notice this was the wrong way as I was sitting at the light waiting to turn left instead of right!?
Example Three: I was driving to work, yet again, and realized that I was wearing my slippers...
Example Four (and most humiliating): At work I dropped a metal bar on my foot and swore.... in front of a customer! Not a proud moment (in my defense though, I swore under my breath and it wasn't the F-bomb)! The lady started cracking up because I was so embarrassed and then swore also to try and make me feel better.
Lets just hope my brain gets back in town by Friday. I'm going to a comedy show with some friends and last time we went to this place I told some guy he had an ugly haircut. And no, it wasn't part of the comedy act. I am just that good.
Oh, and the title to this post is actually a famous line from my little brother. My family and I were vacationing in Mexico one year, he was about 6, and he said this to us. He was very determined to get a good tan.
9 comments:
I thought he was only three or something. Oh the lines we get from our family.
I love this post!
Thata was so hilarious I can't even comment.
I'm laughing so hard, about your drive to work taking the wrong exit and then going the wrong way! This post totally made my day, too funny! LOL
you are funny. i loved reading this post.
Ok, now I've quit laughing.
Yeah, I think Jo is right, he had to be closer to 3. You sure as heck don't expect me to REMEMBER I hope!
At my age, when the brain goes on vacation it checks in to a rest home and zones out permanently.
Not to make you feel any worse but I have Example Five for you. What about the time you went to work on Sunday and couldn't figure out why all the lights were off and no one was there to open the store. Come to find out you were there an hour early! No worries though, "you're weird"! ;)
I'm pretty sure the comment about the bad haircut was not the worst thing you said at the last show. I clearly remember something about pit stains! ;) So as far as I'm concerned your brain can still be on vacation as long as you have your filter back!
Dont' worry, I have left for work without any shoes at all before! I got half way to Layton and had to turn around. Good thing it was when I was working at Macy's!
I hope your brain comes back well rest and not burnt!
Oh this is too good. You come up with the best titles for posts! And yes our family does have some of the best lines and words. Don't ask Jake about newferd though.
You know what all this last week, I feel like I have literally been asleep. Like just today and yesterday I was waking up from a long winter's nap. I'm blaming the inversion.
And ouch - that bar had to hurt.
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